33 is a good number isn’t it? I’m 33 weeks today. And 33 years old (And 33% crazy, right?). And I managed to take a picture today, too. And it’s not an even-numbered week! What is the world coming to??? Actually, I decided I should start taking weekly pictures, even if I don’t look all that different, because as these weeks keep coming, you never know at what point I may go in to labor, right? I mean, really. They need to stay put for now, but I’m not counting on anything, to be honest*.
Anyway, yes. It does look surprisingly like last week’s shot, but that’s mostly because (1) it’s only been a week, and (2) I have only a few shirts that still fit, and this is one I wear pretty often, I guess. So yeah. Let’s just pretend it’s vastly different, because it’s really starting to feel vastly different.
And that’s a weird thing about pregnancy. Each moment of difference is almost shocking, like you suddenly notice that you cannot reach the floorboard of the car anymore. But you contort yourself and somehow manage to get that piece of paper you dropped down there. But then, the next week, though you’ve relented to the fact that you’ll have to contort yourself to reach the floorboard, it doesn’t work this time! And it’s almost startling. Because even though you expect that things will naturally progress and movements will become more difficult, just as you get used to things being one way, you’re surprised at exactly how much more difficult things can be.
So that’s where I find myself these days, in constant awe over how little control I have over my own body, how difficult every movement has become. And if the history of this pregnancy has taught me nothing, it’s taught me that just when you think things cannot possibly become any more of a strain, your body finds whole new ways of messing with you.
Yes. I am tired. I don’t sleep well. Getting comfortable is pretty much a thing of the past. My wrists hurt (like HURT hurt). My feet are planks (they actually feel rubbery. So. Frickin’. WEIRD.). Headaches are almost daily. These babies are heavy. I simply cannot move normally, and that gets really frustrating at times. And I know that as hard as it may feel now, it’s only going to get harder in the coming weeks.
BUT, frankly, all things considered, I’m still in a pretty decent mood 90% of the time. The 10% bad-mood-time seems to pass quickly, but I’m suddenly noticing it’s existence all the same. I feel like I put on a happy face (not hard when I really am very happy at my core), but sometimes, I really just want to be left alone. I don’t want the clerk at the store to ask me how it’s going, because I know that it’s going 90% good– she just happens to ask me as I’ve completed my tenth lap around the store looking for something that I’ve already been to three other stores to find and I’m physically exhausted, and I don’t want to say so, because I don’t want to become someone’s “Oh, Poor Thing!” person. Because I’m NOT that person. I have, frankly, kicked pregnancy’s ass. It’s taken 30+ weeks for pregnancy to even begin to get the better of me, and I’m not going down without a fight!
It’s like after years and years of my body messing with me, I’m just not going to let it take this awesome time away from me. I’m getting one shot at this whole gestation thing, and I’m going to enjoy as much of it as I can while I have it. So yes. I acknowledge that twin pregnancy is tough, and that it is having a undeniable physical effect on me. But that doesn’t mean I have to let it get me down. I don’t have to let pregnancy kick my ass.
In other news, as of late, the mail man/Fed Ex guy/UPS dude are all probably hating me. I said in my previous post that I had finally ordered a bunch of stuff from Amazon, etc., and so the stuff has begun to arrive this week. And for some reason, it all got broken into small shipments, which means that every day, there’s a package waiting on my porch when I come home. Which is actually pretty awesome (for me, at least. I love getting stuff in the mail!). Additionally, I’ve also signed up to do some product reviews (coming later this week!), and so I’ve received these things in the post as well. I’m actually very excited about both of these reviews, but you’ll have to wait until I post them to find out what I’ve been asked to review…
Of course, there is one special thing I ordered a while back that is due to arrive any day now. I wanted to wait until I actually received it before gushing over it, but I just cannot wait. I told H a while back that I wanted some piece of jewelry to mark the occasion of the birth of these boys. I looked here and there at various jewelry sites and twin-specific sites and never really found much that caught my fancy. I came upon Scrollwork Designs‘ etsy shop and was pretty immediately charmed by her work. And so I contacted her to see if she would be willing to do something custom for me.
While she doesn’t do custom work, per se, she did agree to create something based on my requests that I could either take or leave once she was finished. And so, I asked for something with a blue stone, preferably square, that would commemorate this crazy time of becoming a mother to twin boys. Here is what she made for me:
I couldn’t be happier. It’s absolutely perfect. I love the inclusion of the gemini detail on the back side of the ring, because not only does it refer to twins, but also will probably be the sign under which these boys are born. The stone is gorgeous, and I really, truly cannot wait for this ring to arrive (the post office says it’s here in Winston today… let’s see if it makes it to my house in today’s mail drop..). I could also see this pendant being a wonderful gift for a to-be-twin mother (or grandmother…). I love her work, and I hope you’ll check out her shop. Her prices are more than reasonable for hand-crafted jewelry, and each piece is one-of-a-kind. Every time I stop by there, I find it hard to leave without buying something!
So yes. Lazy Kate has taken over. I sleep a lot (when I’m not being kept awake by the bludgeoning of my internal organs by four tiny limbs…). I eat a lot. I order stuff on line and sort stuff when it arrives a lot. And that’s about it for 33 weeks.
*my dear friend I mentioned in a post long ago, who was dealing with Empty Follicle Syndrome, who was three or so weeks behind me in her pregnancy, after spending three weeks on hospital bedrest, was unable to keep her babies in any longer and gave birth two days ago to a sweet and gorgeous boy and girl. Congrats, S! I know you probably aren’t reading right now, but I’m thinking of you guys all the same and wishing you a quick and painless-as-possible stay in the NICU!