DSLR Means…

I cannot think of a good substitute for the DSLR acronym that reflects: “Oh, Jack, you monkey-child, WHY did you have to reach for the expensive camera and toss it to the floor while you were sitting with me at my desk last week??”

I was trying to be all crafty there, and the truth is, I can’t think of anything clever to say other than my dear Jack boy yanked my camera off my desk and on to the floor sometime last week (or maybe before, I cannot remember), this while he was contained in my lap, and my camera is broken and I’ll have to send it off for repairs because there are no local camera repair shops. I think (I hope) it’s just the LCD screen that’s messed up. The lens that was attached to the camera at the time of the fall appears fine, the photo mechanisms seem fine, I just cannot view any of the shot stats or any of the photos after they’ve been taken (which kinda defeats the instant-feedback benefit of using a digital camera…).

Anyhow, that is what it is, I suppose. I do luckily have my fairly decent backup (fully programmable) point-and-shoot, so I can still take pictures, which is good because today my boys turn NINE MONTHS OLD. NINE. MONTHS. OLD.

My NINE MONTH OLDS are sitting on the floor over there, shaking maracas at each other and laughing. Jack is periodically stopping to “sing” into the toy microphone and Henry is trying to yank his blanket out from under himself. I wonder if I can finish the now-much-belated eight month review (to say nothing of the nine month review) before they’re ten months old…

Things like this happen, the whole Destructo-Jack-wiggle-worm-baby thing, and H asks questions about when we can start disciplinging them, which comes from equal parts inexperienced parent and stereotypical Germanness. The man cannot wait to instill some discipline in his children. Which is hilarious to me, mostly because the idea of trying to explain behavior expectations to an eight (ahem, NINE!) month-old is absurd. You can guide them in certain ways (like, say, ending a nursing session when a baby bites), but there is no “time out” for a baby. They just don’t get it.

It reminds me of those idiots who give you the stink-eye in a restaurant because your six month old is cooing and giggling and squealing, like ‘Can’t you control that baby?’ (Aside here to the not-so-swell person who once said that she wanted to “stop by [my blog] in the future, just to see how [I] handle things” now that I have children? Yeah, I *still* have not taken my screaming, overtired children into a nice restaurant for a 9:00 p.m. dinner seating. I’m afraid the closest I’ve come to that is taking my boys with me to a nice restaurant mid-week for a 2:00 lunch wherein I had to give Henry extra Cheerios to keep his delighted squeals to a reasonable, conversational volume. Any other instance of even slight fussiness has been met with immediate removal from whatever restaurant we were at, even McDonalds. I know you’re still waiting with bated breath to watch me eat crow for calling out a shitty parent for taking their fussy, whiny, overtired three year old to a very nice restaurant late at night, but I’m afraid you’re just going to have to wait a bit longer, because I still don’t find such behavior acceptable, and I can’t imagine when I will. But hey, feel free to keep “stopping by” to find out when that might happen…)
Those looks, as if you could control a six-month-old (I mean, like you’d want to stop them from cooing happily anyway…)? Yeah, they just crack me up, but they obviously also come from people who don’t have much experience with children, who think that “discipline” is something that you begin at birth, and I’m afraid my husband is still kinda one of them.

Anyhow, I set him straight, but I know it pains his dear German heart to know that it will still be some time before order can be brought from chaos (if ever)…

SO. Nine-month-olds in the house! Doesn’t that sound so much older than 8-month-olds?

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6 Responses to DSLR Means…

  1. Rachel says:

    Oh dear, wherever are we going to meet up? You know that the dumpling has already been to 3 restaurants, and I’d hardly say that he slept through the full experience … in all seriousness I think it’s great that you are so considerate, but seriously restaurants are public, babies are cute, and people need to get over themselves. Exactly because you can’t discipline them, other people will eventually have to put up with them a bit. Of course, in retrospect I think we’ve only ever removed the fusspot from a restaurant twice and the poor kid has certainly been in a hundred restaurants given our travels …

  2. Tara (TIMO) says:

    Oh Jack, how are we going to coo over your adorableness if your Mama doesn’t have her camera? I hope the DSLR has a quick, easy and inexpensive return to you. That’s why we just bought a new point-and-shoot instead of a DSLR. Two little boys that love to look at themselves in the screen on the back of the camera.

    Happy Birthday Jack and Henry! Three-quarters of a year already, it’s hard to believe.

    We started giving the boys timeouts when they were about a year old. One minute in the pack-n-play and we sat on couch 2′ away watching them. But only for serious offenses (ie, biting your brother). It’s been a while since either have gotten one. Nav still doesn’t understand the “say no and redirect” way of parenting. He says no from a distance and then gets madder and madder when they don’t stop. I’ve told him he needs to get down on their level, say no, and then give them something positive to do instead. One of these days he’ll get it.

    We took the boys to a “fancy” restaurant (our first time at this particular place) last weekend. They sat us right in the middle of the dining room and then made us move because the “highchairs were blocking the aisle and that was against firecode”. Uh huh. We got moved to a much nicer table in a back corner. It worked perfectly because the boys could chat all they wanted without disturbing anyone. They had a great time and made a huge mess but all was good. And the fountains at the exit door, instant smiles.

  3. jill says:

    Your poor camera! and wow! I can’t believe they are already 9 months old. They amaze me with their cuteness everytime I see the pictures you post 🙂

    I’m still here… just very quiet lately. I just read your “Our Story” post and it’s crazy that I’ve been reading your blog for over 2 years now… I remember your posts about the Germany trip really drew me in.

    Also, good luck with joing the Y and starting to run again! I hope the day care situation there works out well for you. I wish I could find a place around here with a nice indoor track. The winters are tough for a non-treadmill runner who lives in the NE – I didn’t run this entire winter (3 months) and started getting really antsy.

  4. Trinity says:

    I love the mental picture I have of your babes shaking their maracas! 🙂 So big, so stinkin’ adorable.

    We’ve not been out to dinner really since we had Arlo. We’ve gone out to lunch, but mostly to really low-key bakery type places where kids and noise are generally well accepted. I did have one experience, though, where someone was giving me the staredown when 6week Arlo got a little fussy. It made me feel like I was the worst, most incompetent new parent ever, which made me feel defensive, which made me rudely return their stink-eye with less grace than I usually carry. Whatevs.

    Happy 9 months, Henry and Jack! 🙂

  5. sassymama says:

    9 months is CLEARLY a totally different ball game than 8 months. They are practically driving now:). For some reason, certain milestones seem very significant. 9 months was one of those for me, too.

    Ouch on the camera…

  6. strongblonde says:

    oh no!! your poor camera 😦 at least you have a backup! i’m kicking myself since i have not gotten out the camera in a LONG time. B has, but not me. I’m already regretting it!

    you have 9 month olds? that’s soooooo old! that was a big milestone for us. they just seemed so much older. in fact, every month after nine months also seemed so much older. their development becomes so much more interactive. they are talking more, moving more, and just *doing* more. it’s fun! the start of a new stage!

    any more running? i can’t imagine it’s easy right now. at least it wasn’t for me at that age. lol. i just started again when the kids were 15 months. and that even seemed to be more than i could handle. maybe they were 16 months. at any rate….i’m trying 😉 lol.

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